hi, can someone make me a crossover? I may ask a little too much

Background:
http://i51.photobucket.com/albums/f382/hello9055/greenbackground01.jpg
Banner:

its only a small banner
http://i51.photobucket.com/albums/f382/hello9055/HanzBanner004.jpg or can u make me a banner with the same background but bigger saying, failure is a chance to do it better, on the top and at the bottom, Welcome to My pRoFiLE!
Theme:

Green
Tweaks:

Welcome Page Alert saying, wElCoMe 2 mY pRoFile!

Centered Boxes

Transparent boxes

Color of boxes: The kind of green of my background

Floating Boxes

Removed Side Boxes such as friends, advertisements, google, fan of etc.

Exit Page Alert saying, Going Already?

Right Click Page Alert w/ Shaking Window w/ auto logout, saying hOw dArE yOu tRy tO cOpY?

No Copy and Paste

Normal Cursor

Normal Scroll Bar
Sorry if its too much, you can make it .js or .css, its your choice

and please PM me the code and if its JS, tell me what to do, because I never tried using JS. Thanks in advance if you can do it!!