[b]* 3[/b] Topher was driving, sumasakit na ang ulo ko sa dami iniisip ko. “Is that Algin already a friend of yours?” He asked me. “Hindi. It was just a coincidence.” “Tss. Are you sure?” “Wag na natin pag usapan okay? It’s not like we’ll see each other again. Hindi na ako babalik dun.” I told him, para matapos na. I suddenly felt awkward as soon as there was silence. DANG. “Let’s talk.” “We’re talking.” “We need to talk about the thing our parents are talking about.” I coughed. Sh*t. Eto yun e. Yung bagay na.. Takteng yan. “Wag na nating pag usapan. Kung anung desisyon, yun na yun.” He suddenly parked the car in some part of the highway. “Is it alright with you?” He asked me. Nagkibit balikat ako. “Siyempre… Hindi. Di ba alam mo naming wala akong balak na magpatali sa kahit na kanino.” I replied. “Ako rin naman e.” He answered sabay ngisi. “Lalo na sayo.” Big ouch. Pinilit kong ngumiti. “Oo naman. Best friends will always be best friends.” Tumawa siya. “I’m glad you said that.” Another big ouch. “B-Bakit?” I muttered. “We gotta help each other.” He patted my head, hinawi ko yung kamay niya. “Ano?” “Gumawa tayo ng paraan para hindi yun matuloy.” Napalunok ako. “A-Anong gagawin?” “Magpabuntis ka.” Binatukan ko. “Pak ano ka.” I told him. “Wag na. Forget it. Bahala na. Gawin na lang ang dapat gawin.” “Pero hindi yun ang dapat!” He yelled too na parang naaasar. “E mas lalong hindi dapat na mabuntis ako!” I replied to him. “Ogag ka ba?! Magpapabuntis ako?! Kanino naman?!” “E di maghanap tayo.” “ULUL.” I glared at him sabay irap din. “Eto naman, joke lang e..” “Ang joke, nakakatawa.” Natawa rin siya, “Joke nga lang di ba? Wag kang highblood.” I took a deep breath. “A-Ano ba talagang balak mo?” “I think that I should get married.” Nanlaki yung mga mata ko. “H-HA?! Kanino?!” Parang nagulat siya sa reaksyon ko, I came up to a realization too. Calm down, baka makahalata. “Eto naman, nakakagulat yung reaksyon mo.” “E.. E nakakagulat yung sinabi mo e.. Pero di nga.. Totoo?” Natawa siya. “Tanga. Malamang hindi. I’m kidding. I just think that we should just not comply with any of what they want. I think that I’ll be going to tour around the world.” I coughed. “A-Aalis ka?” I asked him. Hindi ko mapigilang maipakita yung lungkot na nararamdaman ko. This is not right. “Iiwan mo ‘ko?” Parang nagulat siya sa reaksyon ko. “O-Oh, bakit ganyan mukha mo?” He asked me. “To make it impossible for us, I can just simply disappear.” Hindi ko maexplain yung nararamdaman ko, pero isa ang sigurado ko, ayokong mawala siya. Tiniis ko na amging kaibigan lang niya. Tiniis ko ang lahat ng sakit na nararamdaman ko tuwing may kasama siyang iba, pag nag kwekwento siya sakin, at yung mga panahong parang wala lang ako sakanya kundi takbuhan pag may kailangan siya. Wag lang siya mawala sa tabi ko. “It’s good to travel to New York, Europe too.. Then maybe Hawaii—” I held onto his sleeve. It was an automatic reaction. “Wag. Please.” He seemed surprised, tapos parang nagtatakang pinisil niya yung pisngi ko. “Bakit naman?” He asked. “Ayokong mawala ka. Hindi ko kaya.” I muttered out of the blue. “D-Dette-?” Then FINALLY, I came up again into a realization. “Ah.. I-I mean, sa tagal ba naman nang pagsasama natin di ba, wala na akong kasama niyan, alam mo naming hindi ako friendly masyado..” “A-Ah! Ahaha! Nga naman..” He mumbled. Ano bang pinagsasasabi ko?! “B-Basta, kakausapin ko sila Mama. And everything will be okay. Wag kang padalos dalos.” “Oo na. Oo na.” -- I returned back home. “Ma! Ma!” I called out. “Anak!” She rushed out from the kitchen. “Pumunta si Christopher dito, tapos—” “Ma, tibo ako.” I told her. I know. This is freaking weird, for me to actually say this, pero eto na lang yung natitirang paraan na naiiisip ko. “A-Ano anak?” “I’m a lesbian. I like women. Hindi kami pwede ni Topher.” “A-Anak.. Ano bang sinasabi mo?” I bit my lower lip. “Nahihiya lang akong aminin sa inyo noon nung tinanong nyo ako, but it already came up to this, kelangang may gawin na ako Ma. Hindi po pwede ‘to.” She sighed. “Lalong lalala ang sitwasyon ng Papa mo pag nalaman niya ‘to.” I was surprised. “Ha? Ano pong ibig niyong sabihin?” -- “PA!” Napasigaw na ako habang tumatakbo papunta sa kamang kinahihigaan ng Papa ko. Inatake siya sa puso. My father has been suffering this disease since I was 15, nung 19 ako, muntikan na talaga siyang matuluyan kasi hindi ako nakauwi sa bahay, natulog ako sa bahay ng classmate ko. Oo, naglayas ako. And never will I do the same mistake again, yun yung pinangako ko sa sarili ko. Hinding hindi na ako gagawa ng kasalanan. I can’t lose my father. Unti-unting namulat yung mga mata niya. “Anak..” “Pa.. Ano pong nangyari?” I asked him. Naluluha na ako. I hugged him tight. “Nalulugi na ang kumpanyang kasisimula pa lang natin, anak. Naipundar na ang lahat lahat ng pera natin para run.” Mama uttered na sapo na rin ang bibig niya. Napalingon ako. Topher and his parents were there. Tears are flowing down my eyes. “There’s nothing we can do anak. We’re.. We’re..” Mama started crying. I don’t know what to do. Topher was helplessly looking at me. His parents started comforting Mama, ako naman napaiyak lang. Anong gagawin ko? -- “Here.” Topher handed me a softdrink in can. Lumabas kami ng ospital, dun lang kami sa may parang garden. I was still feeling lonely, but I already stopped crying. I opened the softdrink and drank. “Okay ka lang ba?” He asked me. Umiling ako. “No, I’m not okay. Wala akong magawa para makatulong. I’m jobless and all. I don’t have anything left to help my parents.” Namumuo nanaman ang mga luhang pinipigilan kong tumulo. I wiped it automatically away. Silence occurred. Napatingin ako kay Topher. “O? Anong iniisip mo?” I asked him. He suddenly looked at me. [i]“Let’s get married.”[/i]