[quote=MaLDiTaNg_SaDe]Things My Mother Taught Me --Anything sound familiar? 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. --'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.' 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. --'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.' 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. --'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!' 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. --'Because I said so, that's why.' 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. --'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.' 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. --'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.' 7. My mother taught me IRONY. --'Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about.' 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. --'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.' 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. --'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!' 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. --'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.' 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. --'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.' 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. --'If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!' 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. --I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.' 14. My mother taught me about ENVY. --'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.' 15. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. --'Just wait until your father gets home.' 16. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. --'You are going to get it when you get home!' 17. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. --'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.' 18. My mother taught me ESP. --'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?' 19. My mother taught me HUMOR. --'When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.' 20. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. --'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.' 21. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. --'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?' 22. My mother taught me WISDOM. --'When you get to be my age, you'll understand[/quote] i super love this. hahaha. it [b]do[/b] sounds like my mom. lol