Raining once again. Just like yesterday, and the other day.
The raindrops are like my teardrops. Whenever it flows by, my tears flows too. All of my problems keeps on flashing through my wobbly mind. [i]Everytime it rains, I can't stop frowning.[/i]
First, matters with my family. Lots and lots of problem. Especially with my mom. She keeps on calling me names like that, and even though she meant it as a joke, it really offends me. My own mother trying to make my self-esteem low? Is it a good idea? That night, I went to the bathroom, cried for a while, then tried to put a big grin on my face before going out. She's my mom. [b]I NEED TO LOVE HER AND I DO ALREADY.[/b]
Second, matters with my online friends. I mean here in Ftalk. I think they hate me, and I think they don't want me as a friend anymore. For example, in the Chatbox, I always need to be the one saying "Hello" first, or else they will snob me. Or maybe, if I post something like, "Testing.. 10, 9, 8.." it means I am waiting for someone to talk to me. You can find true friends with your heart, not with the mouth, not with saying it.
Sometimes, I feel like I want to commit suicide. Seriously. But, I am a Christian, and God doesn't favor that.
Edited~
[spoiler][quote=MiNEKOARCH;#3614718;1275555054]For TPAM. It's true that you can find true friends with your heart, not with your mouth, I clearly understand your point. But, you must also understand that some people will not always be there to give you so much Attention, because It seems like you're always seeking for attention. It's not always the attention that counts, remember that. /: You mustn't dis-consider your True friend, not a true friend just because she/he did not lay attention to you, and just because of that you'll think they hate you, Which is truly wrong. I think you're just misunderstanding everything. I'm not saying this to make you feel weak, and let you leave Ftalk, but because I want you to know my side so that you'll be enlightened and say.. "Ahhhhh, Ganun pala yun." If you consider me a bad person for saying this, well that's fine with me, seriously. I'm just concerned, because you're like being paranoid, thinking of the people that hates you, when they actually do not. Like me, I don't hate you, Tin. In fact, I consider you my younger sister because you like Manga and Japanese stuffs more than I do. (: I love you, K? I'll always be here. D:[/quote]
Okie = )))) But I'm not sad because I don't get attention or whatever, I am just sad for one thing. AND YES, I AM A WEIRD, LAME PARANOID. Anyways, I love you too Paw <333[/spoiler]
Last edited by oniongurl (2010-06-03 05:47:20)