^ yeah you are right in your points. [spoiler]being in a marriage is not as simple as single persons might think. like most people in marriage says "YOU WILL NEVER KNOW THE REAL PERSON UNLESS YOU TWO WILL LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE ROOF IN SOME TIME". not just one day, one month, one year but YEARS. before marrying someone of course you only see all the good things about that person. all the things that you expected about that person is what you will get BEFORE the marriage. and after the marriage realizing that two persons are BIND to live forever together. and you know what? thats the saddest part of the CONCEPTS of marriage. because of "marriage" one is forced &/or NEEDS to stay faithful, loyal, caring and trustworthy to his partner because of "that”. as i said earlier, MARRIAGE or any relationship should be treated like babies... two people who decided to live together forever must always put in mind that there is no such PERMANENT thing in the world. people really change. everything that people expected will fail from time to time. one fact about woman, we really hates disappointments and men always care about their ego and pride. why is it that when man cheated a woman it is not that big deal and vice versa about us woman... nwei getting lost to the topic... in some situations there are infidelities that are caused by a couples misunderstandings and as the above stated, lack of communication is the main problem... that part is correct. for instance, maybe one party got tired of arguing to another, the reason why that person look forward to other people that can understands him/her more than the real partner was doing... same reason why one party fell out of love with the real partner and fall again with another person. yet the decision is WRONG legally and morally speaking right? so who's fault it is? the unhappy cheater or the cheated misunderstood ego claimer partner? nwei... if we really take the concepts of marriage, cheating is terribly wrong but when you take into considerations the emotional factors concern, is the reason were valid? if the cheated partner would realize his/her faults and puts his/her pride to his/her shoes, blames on the cheating partner is not that necessary. couple must have their heart to heart talk. i just want to share this to you guys. before getting in to the matrimonial, the soon to be couple will attend a marriage counseling. Counseling is a must to attend for soon to be couples that decided to marry due to the certificate/proof of attendance. i was so like didn't mind what are the exercises we did in that activity. until after years in a marriage, one day i was so like crazy of remembering one exercise we did in that counseling. the couples are separated to each other, group of brides and group of grooms. they handed us a paper and pen divided into half.. in one part, we are asked to write down all the things that we learn to LOVE about our soon to be husbands and on the other are the things we believe that we HATE about them. it was really funny that i almost fill the LOVE part, full of compliments and good things that i believe i found about my husband. and actually i find it hard to think of what to hate about him. that was during that time... now, if you will ask me to do the same as we did in that exercise, i think i have many things to write about that hate part. in fairness to him i know he also have so much hates in me. and that is what i was telling about in my first part. lesson: MARRIAGE is not a jowk and there`s this reason , in one part of life, marrying someone for the sake of a son/daughter is not a bad decision after all. about the trust issue. yeah it was too fragile. once broken can never be put into pieces as how it is used to be, yet if GOD happens to forgive the sinners, why not you, nor me or anyone who committed that sin? if one person in a marriage did cheat so there is no called MARRIAGE anymore? no more trust, respect, care etch... what can you call that kind of relationship? JUST a Married couple. if a person cannot forgive and live and new life with the same person, might as well get a legal separation. so you two will never suffer from the MARRIAGE thing.[/spoiler] Marriage is the same as the word "Forever" itself.

Last edited by butterfly_lady_08 (2008-12-05 01:55:34)