GUILTY. And if you love reading masochistic lines, or whatever you may call it. Go on. - I'm dwelling on [i]THOSE[/i] things again. And when I say 'those things,' I meant the things from my not so distant past that I'm trying to [b]evade[/b] from my memory. Or whatever I thought I was doing. - I thought I was strong but I guess I'm not. No. I know in my self that I'm not. [b]I'M LYING.[/b] I showed [u]nothing but weakness[/u] to the great public. - I told myself that I had done it. Though, I cheated myself a bit, for that matter. I was scared that I'm gonna lose my sanity if I didn't try, at least, a bit just to show that I wanted to be alive still. [i]Watta loser.[/i] - I still burst into tears whenever I remember it. [b]Every part of it.[/b] Every waking hour that I suffered cause I was so restless, thinking, and maybe even regretting--part of it. It's amazing how I can keep this all inside my head and doesn't even feel the slightest hint of being suicidal when all I could do is just die right here, and now to end my pain. I'm so obvious yet I tend to be very, very unpredictable to other people. It's weird. I'm lost.